Love The One You're With

Always read her. Always, always, always. She's the bombest diggitiest.

This post ain't about loving your significant other. It's about loving your body (gasp!) with all its problems. Or, rather, "problems."

Consider this for a moment. If you have kids or any other “imperfect” people in your life whom you love with the ferocity of a mother bear, think about them now.

Now turn your attention to the idea of loving your body.

Half of you probably already want to vomit, just reading those three words — loving your body.

Shifting gears from loving your beautifully goofy little kid to loving your own body sounds like the needle scratching off a record.

See it all: http://www.stumptuous.com/rant-72-january-2015-love-the-one-youre-with

The Pornographication of Fitness

 The Pornographication of Fitness Needs to Stop

Fitness magazines don't help us get fit. Gazing at images of caricatured breasts, buttocks and biceps gives you the impression this is how a fit body should look, that every fit body needs to be shaped in the same vein. Fitness magazines use exactly these images to "inspire" women to look this way. Yet most of us can't identify with what we are looking at because we don't believe ordinary us could ever be them.  

What has become of fitness? Where is it going? When every image displayed in fitness magazines has become one suggesting women are dressed and posed for the bedroom and not the gym, one might wonder exactly where the future of fitness is going.

http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/tosca-reno/bikini-fitness_b_5610782.html

Fuck. Yes.

Prettiest Wife In The World

Although I've stated, adamantly, that I'm "not fond" of the focus on female appearance, I do love this post so, so much. I hope you do, too:

Ask yourself only this:

Who is telling you that your body isn't the ideal?

Only people who don't really matter. Only people you don't know. Only that same voice in your ear that is telling you you're not a good enough mom or worthy of a raise or shouldn't go back to school or wear that dress.  Are they invested in you? Are they worth believing?

 

http://www.momof4istired.com/2013/11/this-blog-is-going-to-embarrass-my.html?m=0

"Smile!"

I suspect you're with me on this: when someone tells you to smile, you want to punch their stupid face.

If you're not with me, get on board with the anger! Raise that fist!

Okay, so this person probably has their heart in the right place: trying to cheer you up, because you look sad or cranky. But when have you ever snapped out of your sadness or crankiness just because someone TOLD you to? If it was that easy, why would you ever be sad or cranky? "My puppy got run over yesterday, and I'm just shattered by it, but gee, since you told me to smile, random coworker, I'm not sad anymore! Thanks so much!!"

And sometimes you're not unhappy, you're just busy working, deep in thought, fighting with a spreadsheet, whatever. There simply IS no emotion to be had, but...you're supposed to be smiling while you do it? Should you be smiling while you do everything? What the fuck is THAT about?

I'll tell you: it's full-blown sexist bullshit. I would bet my toes that men get told to smile 1% of women's 99%. WOMEN get told to smile because we are supposed to be pleasant to look at. Ornaments. Me like pretty, give it to me.

I don't know about you, but I am not here to be an ornament in someone else's world. Fuck them. If my brow is furrowed in confusion, if my dead puppy makes me cry, if I AM happy and smiling, it has nothing to do with them at all. You want pretty? Go stare at a tree, not me.

I don't yet have a good response to "Smile!" I don't know how to politely tell these people that their well-meaning prompt makes me want to punch their stupid sexist faces. But it does. 

Don't be one of these people.

You Are Not Your Physique

I've shared several posts already about appearance, but I think it bears repeating, over and over AND OVER: 

No one cares how you look. 

If they do, they can fuck off. 

Your loved ones should care how you FEEL. You are not meant to be a pretty ornament in their world. 

Again, if you are: they can fuck off.

Nia Shanks puts these thoughts together in a much kinder, gentler fashion - go read her:

Allow me to be blunt: I don’t give a dang how you look. I don’t care how you look in a bikini. I’m not overly concerned with how much body fat or muscle definition you have (within reason, obviously, for overall health). I’m more concerned with what’s going on inside your mind. Are you happy? Confident? Are you building the body you want? Is this health and fitness journey ENHANCING your life, or dominating it?

Read read read: http://www.niashanks.com/stop-basing-self-worth-physique/

Letting Go

My wise friend shared this link, and it's not just a nice "a ha" kind of article; it's got concrete advice.

Letting Go of Frustrations & Stress

Here’s the thing that will help us in the letting go process: it’s not really the other people or the incoming requests or the shopping or errands or messes that stress us out and frustrate us. It’s not the external circumstances — it’s our desire that relates to these circumstances.

What do I mean? Well, having errands (external circumstance) isn’t the cause of stress — it’s wanting to get all of them done by a certain time, and the worry that we won’t, that stresses us out. Having someone criticize you (external circumstance) doesn’t cause stress — it’s wanting to not be criticized that causes it. Kids making a mess (external circumstance) isn’t the cause of frustration — it’s wanting them not to make the mess that frustrates us.

http://bemorewithless.com/lettinggo/

Mind Your Busyness

The Disease of Being Busy

What happened to a world in which we can sit with the people we love so much and have slow conversations about the state of our heart and soul, conversations that slowly unfold, conversations with pregnant pauses and silences that we are in no rush to fill?

How did we create a world in which we have more and more and more to do with less time for leisure, less time for reflection, less time for community, less time to just… be?

...

I am not asking how many items are on your to-do list, nor asking how many items are in your inbox. I want to know how your heart is doing, at this very moment. Tell me. Tell me your heart is joyous, tell me your heart is aching, tell me your heart is sad, tell me your heart craves a human touch. Examine your own heart, explore your soul, and then tell me something about your heart and your soul. 

Please take 10 minutes to read this: http://onbeing.org/blog/the-disease-of-being-busy/7023

Then read this, a fantastic follow-up: http://onbeing.org/blog/the-thief-of-intimacy-busyness/7031

And then find your schedule, cross some shit off it, and fill that blank space with...nothing. Sweet, blissful, quiet, pointless, meaningful nothingness. Better yet, exactly that, with someone or something you love.

Some of the best moments I've had lately have been cuddling up next to my dog on the floor, hugging him, rubbing his soft brown ears, and telling him that he's the best doggy in the whole wide world.

Meanwhile my house gets dirtier, the dishes get crustier, recorded TV shows don't get watched, and my favorite podcasts stack up. It sounds like a giant waste of time to sit there with my pooch, right?

My friend, it is the perfect waste of time.

Perspective

Jill Coleman has a great post on Nia's website.

http://www.niashanks.com/perspective/

A man walks into a convenience store, and while he’s at the back grabbing a soda out of the cooler, the store gets robbed. The clerk is held up at gunpoint and shots go off around the store in the ensuing scuffle. The man getting the soda drops to the ground and he, along with the other patrons, don’t get hurt. The gunman runs out and ends up being chased and apprehended by nearby cops.

After this event, the man who was buying the soda comes out and people have gathered. One passerby approaches him and says, “Man, what bad luck you had being in the store at the exact time it was held up! What are the chances! Life’s a bitch!” And the man stands there, thinking on the comment for a moment and then says, “I don’t know, I’m just grateful that I got out without a gun shot wound and everyone is safe.”

Same scene. Two perspectives.

Which one serves the man more? The “life’s a bitch” perception or the attitude of gratitude? Which one will keep him small, scared, and insecure? And which one will help him be resilient, risk-taking and confident?

Read it. Absorb it. Try it.

http://www.niashanks.com/perspective/

How to Talk to Your Daughter About Her Body

How to talk to your daughter about her body, step one: Don't talk to your daughter about her body, except to teach her how it works.

...

Encourage your daughter to run because it makes her feel less stressed. Encourage your daughter to climb mountains because there is nowhere better to explore your spirituality than the peak of the universe. Encourage your daughter to surf, or rock climb, or mountain bike because it scares her and that's a good thing sometimes. 

YES YES YES.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sarah-koppelkam/body-image_b_3678534.html

Are My Muscles Feminine Enough For You?

For the past month or so, I've really been noticing my upper body muscles. Admiring their increasing size, their increasing definition, flexing to see just how much striation I can produce. Getting hulky. I am LOVING my strength with every fiber of my being.

After spending my entire life feeling like a weak, pathetic, little wimp of a girl, and feeling as though I'm expected to be a delicate ladylike flower, it's an amazing, life-changing difference to feel STRONG. Powerful. Confident. Badass. Ready for life.

And yet ... somewhere around two weeks ago, I started to wonder what others think of my upper body. My shoulders and biceps are decidedly not feminine. If I presented you with a cropped picture of me flexing them, I suspect you'd first assume it's a man's arms. I'm nowhere near the impressive definition of fitness models, but my addiction to pull-ups and benching has produced some serious muscle.

Yet society's preference for females is that we be lean & thin with only light muscle definition. Which I will never be. I'm way beyond light muscle, and don't intend to make myself weaker in order to shrink these unladylike muscles down. And lean & thin, regardless of my muscle size, takes a level of effort - & unhappiness - that I'm simply not willing to trade anymore. So I started to get a little down as it sank in: I just can't win at this game.

Or can I?

Because who says I even have to play that game? Why the fuck should I care what society deems attractive? Do I exist solely to present an appealing image to others? Is that my purpose on Earth?

Abso-fucking-lutely NOT.

I do not lift weights to look good. I lift weights to BE strong.

I do not run to look good. I run to FEEL amazing.

Because when I am strong, I am happy. Because when running is fun, I am happy. And if I am happy, then I am winning at the game of life. Period.

I don't need society's stupid pointless games; I'm too busy enjoying my life. Now, please excuse me while I go bench-press some humans.

Start Living

I love everything this genius woman writes. I hope that you will, too. Here's her latest:

http://www.stumptuous.com/stop-antfucking-start-living

Here's just a little dose of why to love her:

• How much can you squat/bench press/deadlift?
• Not enough, ever.
• Why do you have to cuss so much? Isn’t there a way to make your point without profanity? Don’t you consider yourself a role model? Think of the children!  
• Because it’s my site and I can. (See Dictatorship, benevolent.)
• Isn’t there a way to eat food without flavour? Sure, but why? The Anglo-Saxons and Normans brought English the gift of short, zesty linguistic punctuation. Don’t be a re-gifter.
• I weep for a world in which athletes are “role models” and a woman who likes lifting heavy things is expected to act like a debutante. And you wonder why we’re so screwed up.
• Fuck off. 

Seriously, go fall in love: http://www.stumptuous.com/about

More Rog Law

Seriously. Read, like, everything this guy writes. All of it.

Each of these recent posts is golden:

http://roglawfitness.com/how-to-take-charge-of-your-motivation/

http://roglawfitness.com/man-wastes-life-so-you-dont-have-to/

http://roglawfitness.com/the-great-comparison-hoax/

Cost of Success

Everything you choose to do has opportunity costs - something you have to NOT do in order to do the thing you have chosen. It may mean less time with your TV to get in that workout. It may mean less time for your workout to spend time with your kids. It may mean you can't keep up with Facebook because you're spending time with your closest friends in real life.

You have a limited amount of time, and every minute you spend doing one thing means you have lost the chance to do another thing. Every trade-off is a sacrifice.

This post talks about making sure you have thought about the things you are sacrificing, or are willing to sacrifice, for your goals. A quick but thought-provoking read:

http://successify.net/2013/05/29/the-success-auction-how-much-would-you-pay/

Whatever you determine success to be for your life, attaining it will require some kind of sacrifice; whether it be time, money, focus, etc. Nothing worthwhile in this world is created without some kind of personal sacrifice.

That is why relatively few people ever achieve what they consider “success.” The sacrifice required is often times more than they are willing to give.

http://successify.net/2013/05/29/the-success-auction-how-much-would-you-pay/

For Exercise Noobs

First of all, I heart Rog Law - I will read anything he writes. You should, too. Not only is he smaht, he's also funny and full of swears. That's all it takes to make me a fan!

This post is for the people who want to get into an exercise habit. If it's you, please read.

If it's not you, read it anyway, and I bet you can think of someone to share it with. I don't mean the coworker who YOU think should get moving, but the person who says to you, "I could never do what you do" in a tone both admiring and despairing.

THOSE are the people that need to read things like this. Please share it with them.

http://roglawfitness.com/an-open-letter-to-people-struggling-to-exercise/

Do Something. Anything.

Do what you like. Yoga, running, weight lifting, break dancing or chasing ducks through the park like a crazy person. In the beginning, it really doesn’t matter.

If you’re new to exercise, pick something and get moving just to get the ball rolling. Remove as much friction as you possibly can between you and starting.

Do you need to have a solid plan when starting out? Not at all. Don’t let perfect become the enemy of good enough for the time being – you’ll learn what you need to along the way, refining your aim as you progress. Plus you’ll likely change course plenty of times as you figure out what’s important to you and what isn’t.

One of my first fitness fails was a run in the middle of winter wearing sweatpants, a hoodie, gym shoes and construction gloves because I just finished watching a Rocky montage. I slipped and bruised my tailbone and I gingerly limped my way back across campus while holding my buttcheeks in shame.

See what I mean? Genius advice, AND it's fun. Go.

http://roglawfitness.com/an-open-letter-to-people-struggling-to-exercise/

Stretching Your Limits

This weekend I was privileged to crew a 100-mile footrace for a good friend. He finished 11th, which means he was fast enough for we his crew to also see the super-elite lead runners coming through the aid stations, and it was utterly amazing to watch all of these talented people.

But I am equally amazed by the runners who were on the slow end of the race, the ones who struggled through that brutal course to finish before the 38-hour cutoff at 10pm on NIGHT TWO. That's some indomitable spirit and mental toughness that I envy beyond belief.

And it has me thinking: while I might not ever be on the elite end, I could work on becoming mentally strong enough to be last. I'm not saying I ever want to run 100 miles; not at all. But I'd damn sure like to be mentally capable of something that badass.

Everyone crossing that finish line, hell, the STARTING line, had to face mental & physical lows during the race (& their training) that most of us will never consider putting ourselves in a position to experience.

Yet many all of us will eventually go through mental lows not of our own choosing: injury, death of a loved one, job loss, divorce, etc. And I think the best way to prepare for those is to choose situations that produce temporary lows.

People who push themselves into lows by choice will be far more resilient when the un-chosen lows come their way. They've learned how to cope with lows, and they know how to claw their way back up out of them. They know that the low is not the end. It's only temporary; it may be a deep dark valley, but if they keep going, if they keep pushing themselves, they'll come back up out of it - and they'll enjoy the amazing view at the top of the hill that much more.

This post reminds me of the runners in that race.  You can always do a little more. And once you believe that, you will know that you have no limits.

100 miles is impossible only if you think it is.

http://successify.net/2013/05/23/stretch-3-ways-to-do-more-with-what-you-have/

In life, we determine a task is too hard or impossible long before we have really tapped into our full abilities. This is the root of failure. Determining our full ability based on a flawed misconception of what we think is our limit.

Winners are not just the people who are vastly superior. They are the people who will give just a little bit more than the common person. One more phone call, one more mile, one more push or effort. When the voice in their head says, “You’re done.” they still go a little further. And it is in that extra effort where all of the growth happens. The real victories and successes happen after the point where you first thought, “I should give up.” Because when you stretch to accomplish something great, you never return to your original size. You grow. Mentally, physically, emotionally. And the next time you have a big task to accomplish, your reach will already be a little farther. 

I'll Sleep When I'm Dead

This morning I was listening to a favorite podcaster talk about how he thinks people should be able to get by on less sleep, to function on a night of very low sleep, just toughen up & figure out how to handle it.

That's the way I was raised too; it's a hand-in-hand component of the good ol' work ethic. Work hard, play harder, and get by on 6 hours. Half my damn family seems to be comprised of manure pumpers who work 20-hour days for 6-8 weeks every spring & fall, and they declare that "you just get used to it." This includes my own brother, one of the badassest men I know, who in theory shares the exact same genes as me. He'll tell me that sleep is a luxury for the weak, just suck it up and work through it, ya fucking wimp.

But...some of us honestly can't.

Believe me: I've tried and I've tried, and it never works out. It always turns FUGLY. I feel guilty and lame and weak for needing 8 hours, but I NEED THEM. There is no question that without at least an 8 hour average, I will fall apart. Sometimes I need more than 8. And no amount of willpower & determination & ambition to be as tough as my big bro and get by on less has worked for me, ever. Again: I've tried many times, and I've failed every. single. time.

Whatever genes we share, he is tougher, and that's just the way it is. And yes, it sucks and it's not fair and wah wah wah. But I've stopped crying, built a bridge, and gotten over it. It is what it is.

I'm sleep-sensitive. I need 8 hours, they need to be in a dark room, and I need to be wearing ear plugs. And some days I'll need 10 hours & a nap, too. If you think that makes me weak, then so be it. You are entitled to your opinion. (As for me, I'll take this one.)

Those 8+ hours are what allow me to squat & bench & deadlift & pull-up & run up mountains & help my people & love others & tolerate stress & stay healthy, so I WILL get those hours. I will certainly be jealous of my bro & his 6 (or 4), but I can't change it. And that means I should neither apologize for it, nor fight it, nor (most importantly) dwell on it.

In fact, since I've been getting enough sleep, I wake up naturally, without any kind of alarm most days (if my dog lets me), and feeling good. Happy. Looking forward to my day. I didn't used to feel that way, and I'm pretty damn sure my brother doesn't wake up feeling that way, like, ever.

So maybe the need for 8 hours is actually a gift, after all. I definitely wouldn't want to go back to waking up cranky & exhausted. It's much better this way, knowing & acknowledging my limitation and working within it.

Which brings me to you: what limitation or weakness makes you frustrated & angry? How can you turn that viewpoint around and see it as a gift that has actually enhanced your life?

Stop the Hacking & Just Do Work

Yes, yes, yes, praise Zeus, everything here: Why You Should Stop Hacking Your Life and Invest in The Journey

It’s sexy and easy to frame a narrative of the overnight success story — WhatsApp, Instagram, and American Idol are perfect examples of how the media can twist reality to multiply page views and amplify ratings. But take a peek behind the curtain on any so-called instantaneous triumph and you are certain to find an objective truth that doesn’t fit the neatly packaged narrative. Because every genuine, sustainable success is birthed only from incredible persistence, interminable patience, invisible defeats, rabid dedication and unrelenting passion.

https://medium.com/@richroll/why-you-should-stop-hacking-your-life-and-invest-in-the-journey-7f838b1fa228

False Personas

How utterly exhausting it must be to put on a different persona for different situations, to always be "on" instead of your plain ol' self.

Obviously I understand there are times when one should be professional or formal, and not drop f-bombs constantly (although, if this COULD become acceptable in all situations, that'd be fucking bomb dig) - that's not what I'm talking about.

But to be a different person on the job, a different person with friends, a different person on a committee, a different person amongst family - that is what I'm talking about. That's a life that will exhaust you.

It's so much easier to just be real and genuine and always YOU.

It doesn't take any extra effort to be yourself, you just...be you. That shouldn't be at all exhausting; it should be freeing!

And if the real and genuine YOU isn't good enough for all of those situations, then either decide to work on you, or just say a hearty "fuck off!" to those people and who they need you to be.

You need to be you, and you are enough.

Mindset

Today I noticed my skirt was rather snug, and I thought: "Hm, this must be my first wearing since the last wash, and it hasn't gotten stretched out yet."

But there are days (too many to count) where instead I might have thought, "Jesus, I'm such a fat ass."

Same body size, same skirt, same snugness...but vastly different thoughts, because of a vastly different mindset.

I'm no longer obsessed with my size and wishing I were thinner. Yes, unfortunately, I do still wish I were thinner, but I'm also able to recognize that I am perfectly healthy the size that I am, and that's more important than aesthetics, and so I'm not beating myself up about it. (Most of the time. I am SO not perfect, yo.)

If your initial thought is more along the lines of the second one, blaming the "problem" on your hateful body, know that you CAN change your inner dialogue. It takes time and it takes effort, but a serious mindset shift is possible, and oh so worth it!

Start by reacting to that second thought with a correction that resembles the first. What is REALLY happening? Respond to yourself with the that logical reality. You may not believe it, but it's a starting point. Keep doing it, and eventually that logical reality will take over.

And hey, maybe it really IS that you're fatter than the last time you wore it. That could be the logic as well as the emotion. Then the question you need to ask is: does it matter? Because unless you're unhealthily overweight, it Doesn't. Fucking. Matter.

Your body has a happy point where you feel good, you move well, you have energy, and that may or may not mean you have a layer of fat over your strong muscles. It. Doesn't. Fucking. Matter.

Convince your brain of that, and you will be a hell of a lot happier.

Thoughts on Work

Almost three weeks ago, my company laid off about 25% of the staff. Some of the folks who were cut had LIVED AND BREATHED their job for years. It was their life, their identity, their worth; they were perfect, walking examples of the culture espoused by the company. Yet their position was determined to be extraneous, so despite their utter devotion, they are left jobless.

This is shitty, and it's a good lesson.

It offers up serious perspective for we who remain, and anyone working anywhere: yes, we may love the company; yes, we may love our coworkers; yes, we may love our jobs; but IT IS A JOB. It is not our life, not our identity, not who we are. Be willing to bust ass temporarily, absolutely, when times require; but do not, do fucking NOT, bust ass indefinitely. It simply isn't worth it.

This also applies to someone building a business, a brand, creating a new world that needs attention & devotion & nurturing. That person may very easily let their identity become that new business, a dangerous thing. Yes, you may need to throw yourself in for a long, long while, but you must aim to build a business that doesn't indefinitely require slavish devotion to succeed, so that you can gradually remove yourself from full immersion, and enjoy a return to normal working hours that allows time with your people & your hobbies.

Either way, worker bee or top dog, it's simply not sustainable to invest your everything in your career. Even if it's fulfilling and energizes you, do you really want it to be your whole life? Would your significant other agree with such a priority?  Your kids? Your pets? The friends & relatives you're too busy to visit?

When you're at work, yes, please commit yourself. But when your hours are up, drop the worries, leave them right at that desk, and walk the fuck away; you'll pick them up again tomorrow. But leave them there each night.

Go home. Go play. Go love. Be there, fully present, in YOUR LIFE.

5 Pictures That Make You Feel Beautiful

Lately it's a thing on Facebook to share five pictures that make you feel beautiful. While I love the idea of finding things you like about yourself, and celebrating them, every time I see a friend do this, I cringe.

While some of these pictures are more about the feeling they had at the time (such as hugging a child), most of them are pictures from a wedding, or posed family shots, where they were specifically dolled up to look their best.

This tells us that most of the time, in ordinary everyday life, they do not feel beautiful, and some may think it's sad that they don't feel beautiful every moment.

I think it's a goddamn tragedy that anyone even thinks about it.

Because here's the thing I want them, you, me, all of us to get: no one cares what you look like. And if they do, fuck them and their shallow bullshit. Yes, that goes for your significant other, too.

Think about it: I hope you can agree with me when I say that I don't give a flying fuck what my friends look like. I care who they are inside: kind, funny, generous, smart, fun. They don't need to lose weight or gain weight or get stronger to change my opinion about them; fat or lean or in between, they are the same wonderful person to me, and the outside is irrelevant. If they are supermodel beautiful on the outside, but act like assholes, then we're absolutely not going to hang out.

The extent I might care about my friends' appearance is this: are you healthy enough to do the things you want to do? That is all that matters. If that's possible in your body's current state, then you are perfect as you are. You should post 5 pictures of those fun activities you can do.

If it's not possible in your body's current state, then start making progress, whether that means more strength or more endurance or whatever, to do those things you desire. And you should post 5 pictures of the efforts you're making.

And if, in those 5 pictures, you are a sweaty, ponytailed, unmakeuped messy disaster, then all the better!

Because the way you feel is more important than the way you look, and maybe when we stop trying to show only our best appearance, and instead just show ourselves in our real, honest glory, however that looks, we'll finally understand that it is in fact the GLORY of us that our loved ones truly love to see.

Our people don't care if we look perfect - they just want us to be perfectly happy.

Your Body is NOT Your Masterpiece

Please please please go read this entire post. It says everything you need to hear.

Stop spending all day obsessing, cursing, perfecting your body like it’s all you’ve got to offer the world. Your body is not your art, it’s your paintbrush. Whether your paintbrush is a tall paintbrush or a thin paintbrush or a stocky paintbrush or a scratched up paintbrush is completely irrelevant. What is relevant is that YOU HAVE A PAINTBRUSH which can be used to transfer your insides onto the canvas of your life- where others can see it and be inspired and comforted by it.

spending all day obsessing, cursing, perfecting your body like it’s all you’ve got to offer the world. Your body is not your art - See more at: http://momastery.com/blog/2014/07/06/body-masterpiece/#sthash.jFN9Ex0v.dpuf

http://momastery.com/blog/2014/07/06/body-masterpiece/

Carrying Stress

A few weeks back I had a shitty experience with someone who is otherwise amazing, and I dwelled on it. And dwelled and dwelled and fucking DWELLED. I internalized the issue and basically could not stop thinking about it for days.

And then I read this short little blurb, and from then onward, whenever my thoughts started to trek back toward those awful thoughts, I would tell myself, "Put the glass down." This would interrupt that crazy train and settle my thoughts back down, until I was eventually over it.

It may also work for you. Take 30 seconds to read this: http://kathyhadleylifecoach.com/put-the-glass-down/

Watch Your Mouth!

This post, by the lovely Amy Kubal, is a great read. It's about how you talk to yourself, and how you'd never ever be such a giant asshole to your friends, so why the hell would you say it to you?

Definitely click all her links, too, for funny bonuses. Her sense of humor is probably why I love her. Well, that and she's a damn genius.

Most of us approach others with gentleness, grace, understanding, kindness and we’re totally rational when looking at their situations. We know that it’s not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things if our best friend confides that he/she ate a pan of brownies or if he/she hasn’t worked out in the last two weeks or if they didn’t get that promotion at work. We know that they’re going to be okay and we definitely don’t like or love them any less. Right?

Okay, so now think of the last conversation you had with yourself. Was it, in any way shape or form, gentle or complimentary? Was it even rational? It’s funny, how we completely break all of our communication etiquette rules when we talk to ourselves.

It's all here: http://robbwolf.com/2014/07/17/talking/

Go!!

About This Blog

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What have you done to reach a goal today? Have you taken a step in the right direction? If not, ask yourself, is it really something you want? If it was, wouldn't you be doing everything in your power to realize it? Did your last training session reflect on your goals? Your last meal? Your last financial choice? The friends you surround yourself with? The way you handle relationships and responsibility? Is there any "here and now” impulse that is worth taking in place of your goals?

 

These are questions only you can and should answer. Don't lie to yourself, don't sell yourself short, don't make excuses. Instead of explaining why you can't, show that you did.

 

-Steve Reishus

Purpose: To share things that will help you to show that you did...whatever that "did" is, from running to lifting to being a better person.

It may be some of my own musings, but mostly it will be recommended reading by assorted geniuses.

Or whatever I feel like sharing, because it's mine to play with.